How To Deal With Collection Agents
1. Tell them you are glad that they called, and ask them if they can hook you up with any job leads.
2. When they ask for you, ask them, “Who may I tell her is calling?” in a polite voice. They will say their name. Then ask, “And who are you with?” They will usually respond with “Who are you?” At this point, you can engage in an entertaining game of 20 questions, such as “Where do you live?,” “When do you have dinner?” and “What is your favorite color?
3. For a long time, a guy named Amir kept calling me. He was actually not so offensive. I figured maybe he was filling an outsourced job and really didn’t give a damn. He called everyday. I told him, “Amir sweetie, you have got to stop calling me! My husband is getting really angry!” Sometimes I’d whisper, “Gotta go love, my husband is getting home.” Left him fairly speechless, which is rare with these guys.
4. Sing them children’s songs. My goodness, their job must be dismal, with all the hang-ups and guilt from bullying people about money so that they can help their conglomerate interest-gobbling employers. The ABC song is good, because at the end, you can say “Next time won’t you sing with me…” One guy liked this one so much he called back for more!
5. If they are mean, show empathy. Tell them that you are sorry that they have to do such crummy work for such low pay.
6. Tell a good joke. Or laugh yourself. Like, “Ha ha ha. I’m really going to tell you my address! That’s a good one! You are so funny! What, I’m crazy? Can you help?”
7. Answer the phone and say, “You’re looking for _______? Man, you’d better let me know when you find that (insert insulting name of your choice here), because she owes me money. Skipped out on the rent and everything!” Go on and on about how badly you have been mistreated. This one was very effective, and stopped calls for about three weeks.
8. Heavy breathing.
9. Ask them if they’ll charge off some of the debt in exchange for some phone sex.
10. Just hang up the phone.
August 30th, 2006 at 1:37 pm
You gave me a couple of ideas - thanks.
here is what I do with phone solicitors…
first I ask them if they are Naked?
then I tell them that I am naked.
or
ask them to Wave - cause I’m looking in the window from across the street through my telescopic site - just wanted to make sure which one they were.
0r
ask them if they will give me their number so I can call them back during their dinner hour.